Accompanying a story about the JD Wetherspoons pub chain offering very cheap pints, the chart below offers some sound advice on keeping your over-indulging buddy stay alive. In a sense, it seems to be their commentary on what offering cheap pints will do, making it funny, but it’s also a good tip should you ever encounter someone passed out. It could happen. Now you’ll know what to do.

The original story ran in Bad Idea, a UK magazine which bills itself as “the magazine of journalism, ideas and opinion for intelligent young Britain. Reinvigorating the form of narrative journalism, it’s the new stomping ground for ambitious young British writers, a braggadocious melting pot of tragedy, parties, love, death, cybersex and stretched cricket metaphors.” Which still makes me wonder if they’re serious or have their tongue firmly in their cheek.