Beer In Ads #2197: Heineken Refreshes Baldness


Friday’s ad is for Heineken, from the 1970s. In the later 1970s, Heineken embarked on a series of ads with the tagline “Heineken Refreshes the Parts Other Beers Cannot Reach.” Many of the ads were in a sequential panel, or comic strip, format and they were intended to be humorous.

In this ad, a three-panel format, a bald man is in the first panel. Although I didn’t know who he was, apparently it’s Duncan Goodhew, an “English former competitive swimmer. After swimming competitively in America as a collegian at North Carolina State University, he was an Olympic swimmer for Great Britain and won Olympic gold and bronze medals at the 1980 Summer Olympics in Moscow. He also swam at the 1976 Summer Olympics.” In the second panel, Goodhew sips from a mug of Heineken. You’d think the last panel would have shown our guy with a full head of hair. The tagline was changed “parts” to “pates,” which means “head.” But he has added some fur on top of his bald pate, although it is in the form of a live rabbit. Close, but not quite. If it wasn’t Heineken maybe I’d think they were trying to say the beer was “hoppy.”

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Beer In Ads #2196: Heineken Refreshes Joe Jordan


Thursday’s ad is for Heineken, from the 1970s. In the later 1970s, Heineken embarked on a series of ads with the tagline “Heineken Refreshes the Parts Other Beers Cannot Reach.” Many of the ads were in a sequential panel, or comic strip, format and they were intended to be humorous.

In this ad, a four-panel box format, featuring illustrations of Scottish football player, coach and manager Joe Jordan. “A former striker, he played for Leeds United, Manchester United, and Milan, among others at club level, as well making 52 appearances and scoring 11 goals for Scotland. As a player he gained a fearsome ‘Jaws’ persona due to having lost two front teeth early in his career.” And that’s the angle played in the ad, where in the first panel he’s holding a mug of Heineken, smiling broadly through two missing front teeth. In the second he’s downing the beer, while by the third panel his missing teeth are back, plus his teeth are gleaming white now. So that’s a pretty impressive beer.

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Beer In Ads #2195: Heineken Refreshes Don Martin


Wednesday’s ad is for Heineken, from the 1970s. In the later 1970s, Heineken embarked on a series of ads with the tagline “Heineken Refreshes the Parts Other Beers Cannot Reach.” Many of the ads were in a sequential panel, or comic strip, format and they were intended to be humorous.

In this ad, a three-panel format, drawn by cartoonist Don Martin, who was best known for his work in MAD Magazine, a chef looks tired, as evidenced by his hat falling limp behind his head, so he’s drinking a mug of beer. Which — FWOT! — makes his hat stand up stiffly at attention. But in the last panel, once he’s removed his hat, his hair is standing up too, with a part down the center. So that’s where the changed text comes in: it’s not “parts,” but “partings” in this ad. Unfortunately, this was the best resolution of the ad I could find.

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Beer In Ads #2194: Heineken Refreshes Pirates


Tuesday’s ad is for Heineken, from the 1970s. In the later 1970s, Heineken embarked on a series of ads with the tagline “Heineken Refreshes the Parts Other Beers Cannot Reach.” Many of the ads were in a sequential panel, or comic strip, format and they were intended to be humorous.

In this ad, a three-panel format, a classical pirate, complete with eye-patch, parrot and peg leg, is holding a mug of Heineken. In the second panel, he drinks the beer, only to have lost the parrot and gain a vulture along with a second peg leg in the third panel. Not only that, but he’s now sporting a second eye-patch, meaning he’s completely blind. So you might be tempted to ask yourself what went wrong? Why didn’t something good happen to our pirate? A careful reading of the text provides the answer. For most of these ads, the tagline is “Heineken refreshes the parts other beers cannot reach,” but in this case it “refreshes the pirates other beers cannot reach.” So the beer made him more pirate-y, which explains what happened.

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Beer In Ads #2193: Heineken Refreshes J.R. Ewing


Monday’s ad is for Heineken, from the 1970s. In the later 1970s, Heineken embarked on a series of ads with the tagline “Heineken Refreshes the Parts Other Beers Cannot Reach.” Many of the ads were in a sequential panel, or comic strip, format and they were intended to be humorous.

In this ad, a three-panel format, the main protagonist from the television series “Dallas,” which aired from 1978-1991, J.R. Ewing. “The character was portrayed by Larry Hagman. As the show’s most famous character, J. R. has been central to many of the series’ biggest storylines. He is depicted as a covetous, egocentric, manipulative and amoral oil baron with psychopathic tendencies, who is constantly plotting subterfuges to plunder his foes’ wealth.” In the first panel, a grinning J.R. stares straight ahead, obviously up to no good. In the second, he’s now holding a mug of beer, which presumably he’s downed half of, though his devilish expression has not changed. But by the third, the beer has apparently kicked in and a halo has appeared above J.R.’s head. I guess beer turned the naturally evil Ewing good.

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Beer In Ads #2192: Heineken Refreshes Spock


Sunday’s ad is for Heineken, from the 1970s. In the later 1970s, Heineken embarked on a series of ads with the tagline “Heineken Refreshes the Parts Other Beers Cannot Reach.” Many of the ads were in a sequential panel, or comic strip, format and they were intended to be humorous.

In this ad, a three-panel format, Spock from Star Trek must be under the weather, or at least in a bad mood. His ears are limp and drooping. In the second panel, he lifts a mug of beer to his lips and immediately his ears being to perk up. But after finishing his beer, Spock’s ears are standing tall, and even he thinks it’s “illogical.”

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Beer In Ads #2191: Heineken Refreshes Paint By Number


Saturday’s ad is for Heineken, from 1976. In the later 1970s, Heineken embarked on a series of ads with the tagline “Heineken Refreshes the Parts Other Beers Cannot Reach.” Many of the ads were in a sequential panel, or comic strip, format and they were intended to be humorous.

In this ad, a three-panel format, a drinking dutchman holds a mug of Heineken, and is ready to painted by the numbers. Only his beer has been colored. In the second panel, he’s started to drink and color is spreading out from his head to the background. After he’s emptied the mug, he’s fully colored, and so is the background. If Only I could paint a room that easily.

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Beer In Ads #2190: Heineken Refreshes Butterflies


Friday’s ad is for Heineken, from 1978. In the later 1970s, Heineken embarked on a series of ads with the tagline “Heineken Refreshes the Parts Other Beers Cannot Reach.” Many of the ads were in a sequential panel, or comic strip, format and they were intended to be humorous.

In this ad, a two-panel format, a caterpillar is holding a mug of Heineken awkwardly as we appears to walk. But after downing the beer, he’s transformed into a beautiful butterfly. Curiously, he still has some caterpillar legs though so maybe the transformation isn’t complete yet. I’m sure another beer should do the trick.

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Beer In Ads #2189: Heineken Refreshes Hats


Thursday’s ad is for Heineken, from the 1970s. In the later 1970s, Heineken embarked on a series of ads with the tagline “Heineken Refreshes the Parts Other Beers Cannot Reach.” Many of the ads were in a sequential panel, or comic strip, format and they were intended to be humorous.

In this ad, a two-panel format, a posh-looking woman in a pink hat is taking her first sip of beer. Afterwards, her hat balloons to many times its original size, with life-size fruit hanging off of it.

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Hulk Smashes Beer Cans

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Here’s a fun series of photographs by a Japanese photographer who goes by hot kenobi on Instagram. Apparently he likes action figures, especially of super heroes, quite a bit. Both his Instagram and Twitter feed are filled with photos he’s taken of them in all sorts of situations. But lately, several of his works have involved superheroes, mostly from Marvel, having some fun with beer cans and bottles. Enjoy.

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Hulk smashes beer cans.

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Captain America holds a can of Asahi like a punching bag while Iron Man takes a swing at it.

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Spider-Man takes down a beer can with his web.

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Superman easily crushes his can, while the mortal Batman has made only a small dent in his.

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Just to mix things up, Wolverine opens a beer bottle with his adamantium claws, as Spider-Man holds on to it so it won’t fall over and spill.