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Beer In Ads #762: For The Thrill Of Victory Or The Agony Of Defeat

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Tuesday’s ad is for the G. Heilman brand Schmidt, not to be confused with Schmidt’s. I’m not sure when the ad is from, but I imagine the most telling clue is the pull-top crown and the big mouth bottle. Is anybody still using those bottles? The last one I remember was Mickey’s Big Mouth. I haven’t seen them in California for a few years now. Also, with that tagline, For the Thrill of Victory or the Agony of Defeat, I’m not sure how invoking ABC’s Wide World of Sports ties into the beer, although it may offer a clue as the ad’s age. The show debuted in 1961, so it’s likely the ad was sometime after that, though it seems reasonable that it would have been long enough after it began that their catchphrase was already popular. But perhaps it’s the text at the bottom, “the same great beer every time,” that the tagline is referring to; insofar as you don’t want some beers to be winners and others to be losers, it’s consistency that’s king. Anybody have a better theory?

Schmidt-big-mouth

Pretentious Beer Glasses

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pretentious-beer-glasses
These are some of the most unusual and inventive beer glasses I’ve run across for some time now. They’re hand made, mouth-blown glasses by a Matthew Cummings of Louisville, Kentucky and are available through his Etsy store, Pretentious Beer Glasses. You just know that many people will call his efforts pretentious so I love the fact that he decided to just own it and called his company by that name. He only opened for business earlier this month. Below are the five regular glasses that he makes (but for more photos, and to see them larger, visit him at Etsy):

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From left to right: The Hoppy Beer Glass, Ale Glass, Subtle Beer Glass, Malty Beer Glass and the Aromatic Beer Glass.

Each glass is designed for a different range of beers, and you can probably work out what beers go in which glasses by their names.

Below are the same glasses, but filled with beer.
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Here’s a breakdown of each glass:

The Hoppy Beer Glass

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The Hoppy Beer Glass description:

This handmade beer glass is designed to highlight hoppy beers, such as IPAs APAs and also light Belgians. The tulip shape is a favorite glass style of high end beer vendors because of its versatility and enhancement of complicated beers. This tulip is engraved with four dashes on the sides, one for your thumb, and three for your fingers. I make each glass by hand in the hotshop (glass studio) and carve the finger grips on the glass the old fashioned way…lathe cutting. Same process that crystal companies use for their cut crystal glassware, only I leave the glass with a nice satin finish instead of polishing it, which provides better grip. Each glass is 5″ tall and 3.5″ wide, holding 12 oz of liquid with a 1-2 oz head (remember, dimensions will vary slightly as each glass is made by hand).

The Hoppy glass is also available with two types of hand grips, dashes and finger prints.

The Ale Glass

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The Ale Glass description:

This might be the most versatile glass of the set. It is a variation on a typical pint glass that highlights most ales, lighter beers, and hefeweizens. This is an extremely popular glass design for a reason, and I didn’t see any need for drastic alteration to it’s form. But I had to make it mine (as far as design goes), so I went graffiti on it. Take a recognized format, bomb it, and make it your own. Hence the ‘stache. Dimensions are 6.25″ tall and 3.25″ wide (remember, dimensions will vary slightly as each glass is made by hand).

The Subtle Beer Glass

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The Subtle Beer Glass description:

This handmade beer glass is designed to highlight any lighter flavored beer, Lager, Pilsner, Kolsch, etc. The glass is in the traditional format for the style, a tall, narrow cylindrical shape. Yet it possesses a wonderfully “softened” bottom made by indenting the hot glass with newspaper pads while it is being blown. The “softened” bottom is not only ergonomic, but it reveals all the different hues of each beer by presenting the liquid in different densities. Dimensions are approximately 6.75″ tall by 2.5″ wide and holds a 12 oz. pour with 2-3 oz. of head (remember, dimensions will vary slightly as each glass is made by hand).

The Malty Beer Glass

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The Malty Beer Glass description:

This handmade beer glass is meant to highlight just about any beer with distinct notes of malt…including Stouts, and Porters. The glass is also wonderful for any unfiltered beer. The point coming out of the bottom of the glass allows the sediment to cascade to the outer edge of the bottom. While the lowest “waist” keeps the sedimentation at the bottom and out of your teeth! The glass is about 6″ tall and 3.5″ wide, and holds a 12oz. pour with significant head (remember these are handmade and dimensions will vary slightly).

The Aromatic Beer Glass

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The Aromatic Beer Glass description:

This glass is designed to highlight any aromatic beer and or high ABV beer. Obviously reminiscent of the snifter or full bodied red wine glass, it concentrates the volatiles and aromatics of the beer to properly enhance the experience. The main design element is an abstract mountain pushed into the bottom of the glass. As you drink the beverage, the mountain is slowly revealed, emerging from the dark liquid. Dimensions are 4″ tall and 4″ wide, holding 12 oz (remember, dimensions will vary slightly as each glass is made by hand).

In addition, Cummings has one more glass in his store, The Dual, which is an ideal glass for mixing beers:

The Dual Beer Glass

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The Dual Beer Glass description:

This is the first specialty glass released by the Pretentious Beer Glass Company. It is a cylindrical beer glass with two separate chambers inside that combine into one towards the lip. I first began working on this design after having a bartender incorrectly pour a Half and Half, blending the two beers together. This glass is not just the solution to the problem of using a jig to properly pour those types of beers, but it allows you to mix any two beers, even ones that have similar viscosities. A wonderful secondary benefit to this glass is that you can smell the bouquet of both beers simultaneously, where normally you only smell the beer that settles on top. Dimensions vary more on this glass than the others due to production techniques, and are approximately 5-6″ tall and 3″ wide, holding 10-12 oz.

The glasses are a little pricey, but not when you consider that they’re made by hand and are utterly unique. It will be interesting to see how they work. I’ve ordered a set of five, although they won’t make it here by Christmas, and I should point out that you won’t be able to get them for a gift this year since he’s been flooded with orders and is currently sold out.

To see many more photos, and larger ones, visit Matthew Cummings’ Etsy store, Pretentious Beer Glasses.

Cage, Agraffe Or Muselet?

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muselet
Most of you already know I’m a freak for obscure words and language more generally, so I’ll always take a look at a list of curious words. One that I recently was looking over at Mental Floss included such gems as a dringle, which is “to waste time by being lazy,” perfectly describing what I was doing when I discovered that.

But the other word was agraffe, which they defined as being “the wire cage that keeps the cork in a bottle of champagne.” I’d heard the word muselet used before, usually in connection with champagne, but many brewers today also use them, though most people I know refer to them more simply as a “cage,” as in a “cage and cork,” or occasionally a “cage and crown.”
agraffe
But agraffe is a new one on me. A quick search reveals that it’s more often used to refer to a part of a piano, “a guide at the tuning-pin end of the string, screwed into the plate, with holes through which the strings pass.” Most dictionaries I looked at didn’t mention the cage usage at all. Champagne.net does offer this definition.

Literally means “staple” (as in Swingline); in Champagne, this is a large metal clip used to secure the cork before capsules were invented, typically during the second fermentation and aging in bottle. A bottle secured with this clip is said to be agrafé.

Notice they also spell it with only one “f.” Wordnik, in their listing under Century Dictionary does list this usage, as the fifth definition. “n. An iron fastening used to hold in place the cork of a bottle containing champagne or other effervescing wine during the final fermentation.”

Muselet doesn’t show up in most standard dictionaries either, but it is defined, at least, by Wikipedia:

A muselet is a wire cage that fits over the cork of a bottle of champagne, sparkling wine or beer to prevent the cork from emerging under the pressure of the carbonated contents. It derives its name from the French museler, to muzzle. The muselet often has a metal cap incorporated in the design which may show the drink maker’s emblem. They are normally covered by a metal foil envelope. Muselets are also known as wirehoods or Champagne wires.

Neither word is included in the “Dictionary of Beer & Brewing” (2nd ed.), but then “cage” isn’t listed in it, either.

So does anybody know? Those of you in the wine world, is either term in common usage, and, if so, is one preferred over the other? Or are they generally only used in France, perhaps? It seems more likely that they were originally borrowed from the French into English, but have since fallen out of use, or perhaps their usage lingers only in the technical jargon of Champagne and sparking wine. Anyone, anyone? Bueller.

muselet_diagram

Ommegang To Brew “Game Of Thrones” Beer

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game-of-thrones
In case you missed the news, the New York Times Art Beat is reporting that Ommegang will be creating four beers for the popular HBO series Game of Thrones, based on the A SOng of Ice and Fire books by George R.R. Martin. According to Coming Soon: The Beer of Kings:

The first beer, Iron Throne Blonde Ale, will be inaugurated nationwide in late March, to coincide with the Season 3 premiere of “Game of Thrones,” which is scheduled for March 31. Three more beers are planned, with the second to be released next fall. The others will follow in subsequent seasons.

I’m a fan of the show, and my wife and several relatives have read all the books, but this is certainly some odd marketing. If the goal is to make more people watch the show, I can’t see how this will have any effect. If you already like the show, will you seek out the beer just because of the tie-in? I like the beer that Brewery Ommegang makes, but apart from some press and attention, I can’t see how this will help the brand all that much.

Note: These are not the actual labels that Ommegang will create, but some imagined ones that have been floating around the internet since earlier this year, this collection from Geek Tyrant.

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got-lannister-gold-stella

got-greyjoy-beer

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UPDATE 12.18: Ommegang brewmaster Phil Leinhart revealed some additional details about the upcoming Game of Thrones beers in an interview on Guyism. Here’s what he had to say:

[T]he blonde ale is fair in color and soft in appearance, but still holds a complexity and bite.

“With a Lannister currently on the throne, it only made sense to do a delicate, but piercing Golden Blonde Ale with Noble hops,” he said, referring to one of the series’ characters.

Subsequent beers for the collaboration are still being worked on, because the Ommegang team has to wait for the themes and characters to develop in the series’ next season before it can begin crafting the next ale. Capozza said that two additional beers will be released in conjunction with each of the series’ following seasons

And there’s also more about the project came about:

Allison Capozza, a spokeswoman at Ommegang, said that the Game of Thrones creators and producers have long been fans of Brewery Ommegang, whose team happens to enjoy the TV series. HBO, she said, reached out to the brewery about the idea for a collaboration.
“The producers very much resonated with Ommegang’s blend of ‘old world’ and ‘new world’ elements to create something new and unique,” Capozza said.

And below is the official bottle that Ommegang will release next year.

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Pandering To Women

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women
I may not be a woman, but I grew up around them quite a lot as a child, perhaps more than some others (my folks divorced when I was one and I spent most of my formative years among my mother, grandmothers, aunts, etc.) and am fully in touch with my feminine side. Plus, I love quite a few women — one a lot more than others — but count quite a few among my closest friends. So I cringe every time I read about the efforts of big companies to market beer directly to women, believing all it will take to increase market share is more attractive packaging or sweeter flavors. How many of these failed efforts have we endured in just the last decade?

A few days ago, yet another one surfaced, in a Fast Company interview with Carlsberg Group CEO Jorgen Buhl Rasmussen entitled Carlsberg Taps The Next Big Beer Market (Really): Women. This morning, I saw quite a few exasperated tweets and posts from women in the beer industry that I respect, and decided to read the interview. It’s a head-shaker, alright. Riddled with so much wrong, it’s hard to address it all, so I won’t. I’m sure someone will dissect it better than I can.

But, just a few points. First, Rasmussen claims that the “beer category has been suffering in terms of image,” but for just “the last 10 to 15 years.” Um, I can’t actually remember a time when beer wasn’t marketed almost exclusively to men. There are a few post-World War 2 ads that reach out to women — primarily because they were the ones doing the grocery shopping — but by the 1960s it was all men, all the time. And it’s been that way ever since, from the Swedish Bikini Team to Miller’s infamous mud wrestling. But he soldiers on.

Rasmussen and others still think product innovation and marketing brewed drinks toward women is possible. Increasingly, women know about different, palate-friendly beers like Abbey Ales, fruit lambics, ciders, ginger beers, and dark stouts — as well as about the more varied glassware they require and how to pair them with foods. Women want “a less bitter, non-bloating beer that does not give you a malty/hoppy aftertaste and breath,” says Carlsberg spokesman Ben Morton. “Flavor proliferation has become a key feature of beer innovation.”

So what’s the plan? “[H]e wants to come up with new types of drink recipes that can be made in Carlsberg-owned breweries but are lighter in alcohol, refreshing in taste, and perceived as healthy enough to take on wine, champagne, and other drinks vying for women’s dollars.” Rasmussen used to work for Duracell, Gillette Group, Mars, and Unilever, and seems to believe that beer is just the same as marketing razors and candy, but I don’t think that’s true.

Then there’s this bit of wisdom, by Carlsberg’s VP of Marketing, Kirsten Ægidius. “Many young people aren’t keen on the bitter aftertaste of beer.” Uh, huh. That’s why IPA has been the fastest growing category for years.

So I know they can’t help themselves, but I really wish the big beer companies would just stop this insane, asinine belief that reaching women is a matter of finding beer that’s female friendly and is marketed to them like Virginia Slims’ “you’ve come a long way, baby” pandering.

Not surprisingly, I have a lot of female friends who love beer every bit as much as I do. My wife is a beer lover, and probably drinks more beer at home than I do. I know countless female brewers, beer writers and female fans who love craft beer. This is the same craft beer, mind you, that I love, and that every other beer-loving male loves, too. There doesn’t need to be gender-specific beer. That’s a ridiculous notion, but one that keeps resurfacing, even though it fails every single time. I remember an “I Love Toy Trains” video that Porter used to watch when he was younger that showed how in the 1950s Lionel created a toy train set aimed at girls in which all the cars were pastel colors, pink, lavender, etc. It bombed, because the girls who wanted to play with toy trains wanted the same trains that the boys had. It’s hard to imagine why anybody would have thought otherwise.
Young blond woman with glass of beer
So while I hate to speak for women beer lovers, who are quite capable of fending for themselves, I’m just as eager for this nonsense to stop. So here’s a few tips I have for the big beer companies on how to reach women:

  1. Stop pandering to women, just treat them like people.
  2. Stop the obvious sexism in most of your advertising.
  3. Stop ignoring your own involvement in creating the perception that beer is not for women.
  4. Stop assuming women won’t drink anything bitter; coffee is bitter and you don’t see this issue in the coffee industry, do you?
  5. Stop creating packages that you think will appeal to women.
  6. Stop believing that marketing is the answer.

Kazakhstan Beer

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kazakhstan
Today in 1991, Kazakhstan gained their Independence from the USSR.

Kazakhstan
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Kazakhstan Breweries

Kazakhstan Brewery Guides

Other Guides

  • CIA World Factbook
  • Official Website
  • U.S. Embassy
  • Wikipedia

Guild: None Known

National Regulatory Agency: None

Beverage Alcohol Labeling Requirements: Not Known

Drunk Driving Laws: BAC 0.05%

kazakhstan

  • Full Name: Republic of Kazakhstan
  • Location: Central Asia, northwest of China; a small portion west of the Ural (Zhayyq) River in eastern-most Europe
  • Government Type: Republic; authoritarian presidential rule, with little power outside the executive branch
  • Language: Kazakh (Qazaq, state language) 64.4%, Russian (official, used in everyday business) 95%
  • Religion(s): Muslim 47%, Russian Orthodox 44%, Protestant 2%, other 7%
  • Capital: Astana
  • Population: 17,522,010; 60th
  • Area: 2,724,900 sq km, 9th
  • Comparative Area: Slightly less than four times the size of Texas
  • National Food: Beshbarmak
  • National Symbols: Sun and steppe eagle
  • Affiliations: UN, CIS
  • Independence: From the USSR, December 16, 1991

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  • Alcohol Legal: Yes
  • Minimum Drinking Age: 21
  • BAC: 0.05%
  • Number of Breweries: 17

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  • How to Say “Beer”: сыра
  • How to Order a Beer: бір сыра, Жүктеп
  • How to Say “Cheers”: N/A
  • Toasting Etiquette: N/A

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Alcohol Consumption By Type:

  • Beer: 27%
  • Wine: 5%
  • Spirits: 68%
  • Other: <1%

Alcohol Consumption Per Capita (in litres):

  • Recorded: 6.06
  • Unrecorded: 4.90
  • Total: 10.96
  • Beer: 1.69

WHO Alcohol Data:

  • Per Capita Consumption: 6.1 litres
  • Alcohol Consumption Trend: Increase
  • Excise Taxes: Yes
  • Minimum Age: 18 (May have been raised to 21 recently)
  • Sales Restrictions: Time, location
  • Advertising Restrictions: Yes
  • Sponsorship/Promotional Restrictions: N/A

Patterns of Drinking Score: 4

Prohibition: None

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Beer In Ads #760: James Monroe For Budweiser

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Saturday’s ad is the last (that I know of) in the Budweiser historical series from 1908. The black and white ad is text-heavy and includes a history lesson on James Monroe, our fifth president and the architect of the Monroe Doctrine. After the requisite historical bit, it launches into this priceless series of claims:

WHEN old Mother Earth grows better malting barley than northern soil produces —

WHEN the fertile valleys and verdant mountain slopes of Old Bohemia grow better hops —

WHEN natures produces better and purer waters —

WHEN brew-science has been developed to a higher art —

THEN, and not till then, will it be possible to produce a better beer than Budweiser.

Good luck with that.

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Codex Fermentarius

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10-commandments
Here’s another interesting list of the The Brewer’s Ten Commandment, this one more contemporary. It was created by Kelly Ryan, my friend Luke’s assistant brewer at Epic Brewing in New Zealand. He apparently recently left to take a job at a new brewpub in Hamilton, and on his new blog, BeeRevolution, proposed the following as his Codex Fermentarius:

Codex Fermentarius

  1. Thou shalt not covet another brewers’ kegs or casks.
  2. Honour thy other brewer’s recipe choice.
  3. Rejoice to thy daughter yeast and thy mother yeast.
  4. Thy glass shalt always be full. Never half full. Never half empty.
  5. Remember thy first brew day. And keep it holy.
  6. Thou shalt not steal another brewer’s hop combination. This is hopdultery.
  7. Thou shalt not covet another brewery’s name. Or beer name. Especially if it is that of a German cyclist.
  8. Seven days thou shalt labour, and do all thy work. Thou art a brewer. Drinking is work.
  9. Taste thy water, taste thy malted grains, taste thy yeast. Don’t taste thy hop flowers.
  10. Thou shalt not drink false beverages. We know what thee are.

In the body of the text, Ryan also offered to expand the list, and invited people to suggest additional commandments. Here’s a sample of some of the ones he got so far:

  • Release not the fruits of thy labour until thou has rested (at least) upon the seventh day (to banish all traces of the unholy VDK).
  • Thou shall wasteth NO beer. Even if it is 8am.
  • Thou shalt have no other beverage before Beer. A whiskey chaser afterwards, fine, but not before.
  • Ever shalt thou have full tanks and clean lines.
  • Thou shalt not covet thy neighbour’s brewsheet.
  • Thou shall worship local brews, locally – only if your hair doesn’t drop out.
  • Thou shall cry over spilt beer.
  • Thou shall burp as a sign of worship.

There’s some good ones in there. What would you add?

Beer In Ads #759: John Adams For Budweiser

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Friday’s ad is another in the Budweiser historical series from 1908. The black and white ad is text-heavy and includes a history lesson on John Adams, our second president and one of the signers of the Declaration of Independence. The ad makes the curious appeal that any dealer who carries Budweiser will realize less profits than selling other beers. Why? “Because it costs more money at the brewery than any other beer made. A royal brew of malt and hops whose absolute sovereignty has never been challenged.” Interesting strategy. One other anachronistic feature of advertising a century ago. The advert ran in a publication called Pearson’s Advertiser. At the very bottom of the page it includes this gem. “You will confer a favor by mentioning PEARSON’S when you write to advertisers.”

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