Saturday’s ad is yet another one for Falstaff, also from 1959. This is the second ad I’ve found equating manliness with beer, and in particular sports. While the last one was for golf, this ad touts baseball as its “Man Size Pleasure.” It’s got a “A taste to satisfy your biggest thirst … yet always light enough to leave room for more.”
Today in 1967, US Patent 3321861 A was issued, an invention of Charles G. Tate Jr., for his “Beer Tap Handle.” There’s no Abstract, though it’s described this way in the application:
Because of competition most beer companies provide bars with fancy tap handles carrying the name of the particular brew. These handles are changed frequently to attract attention and are made in all materials in numerous shapes and sizes. Attempts have been made to provide such handles with electrically operated devices such as lights and other moving parts. However, most communities are provided with safety regulations which prohibit the use of electric lines to beer tap handles be cause of the danger involved, the bartender normally having wet hands and handling a wet product. Battery power has also been suggested for such purpose but these are expensive because the batteries must be frequently replaced. Furthermore, a busy bartender will often forget to turn the switch and turn on the device when he comes in in the morning. The present invention is designed to provide an electrically powered beer tap handle utilizing rechargeable batteries. The device of the present invention operates with a novel switching arrangement so that the batteries are being charged only overnight when the de vice is not in use. Also, removal of the charging device turns on the beer tap handle.
Friday’s ad is for Falstaff, from 1967. This is such a simple ad, but I actually really like it. Just a full glass and then an empty one; I came, I thirsted. I wonder what that is in Latin? Veni Bibi? And I just love the tagline at the bottom. “Beer after beer — the choicest product of the brewer’s art.”
Today in 1900, US Patent 650377 A was issued, an invention of John F. Dornfeld, for his “Malting-Drum.” There’s no Abstract, though it’s described this way in the application:
The primary object of the invention is to provide, in a malting-drum, an improved construction for positively stirring the steeped barley contained in the drum, whereby the contents of the drum are properly stirred and mixed at all times.
A further object is to provide an improved means for introducing water into the malt whenever necessary in an even and regular quantity and in such manner that the water is thoroughly mixed with the malt.
Thursday’s ad is for Guinness, from 1974, when the James Bond film Man With the Golden Gun was released, which was Roger Moore’s second film portraying the British spy. Today is the birthday of Bond’s creator, author Ian Fleming, and is also known as “James Bond Day.” The Guinness ad is essentially a modified version of the film’s poster, with a man holding a glass of beer in the foreground and round logos replacing the zeroes in 007. And yes, I know Guinness isn’t golden, but the alliteration was too funny not to use. Although apropos of nothing in particular, Guinness announced recently that they will be launching Guinness Golden Ale and last year made a Blonde American Lager.
Today in 1963, US Patent 3091366 A was issued, an invention of Thomas A. Hutsell, for his “Beer Dispenser.” There’s no Abstract, though it’s described this way in the application:
This present device relates to the general art of devices intended for the measuring and dispensing of effervescent beverages. More particularly this invention relates to a beer dispensing device for dispensing draught beer. Means are provided in this present device to automatically dispense a measured amount of beer and the device is further capable for adjustment so that the desired amount of head of foam can be supplied as a part of the measured amount even though the beer in the dispensing keg may have physical properties quite different from that of the beer in the keg to which the device was previously connected.
Today in 1935, US Patent 2003050 A was issued, an invention of Harry Iselin, for his “Beer Container and Cooler.” There’s no Abstract, though it’s described this way in the application as being an “invention [that] appertains to liquid coolers and more particularly to a cooling device for kegs of beer and the like,” adding:
One of the primary objects of my invention is the provision of a novel device for cooling the beer directly in the keg or barrel entirely dispensing with the necessity of cooling coils and the like, the device being of a portable nature, whereby the same is particularly adapted for use on picnics, for use in the home, etc.
Wednesday’s ad is for Falstaff, from 1954. The ad includes a great illustration of St. Louis Cardinals pitcher Dizzy Dean, who’s show relaxing with some beers and showing off his many trophies to a younger couple. AT this point in his career, he’d been retired for years and had been inducted into the baseball hall of fame the previous year.
One of the byproducts of keeping a close watch on prohibitionist groups and other so-called non-profit organizations is that I’ve become quite jaded not just about those particular ones, but about the charitable industrial complex in general. It’s really become big business and, in my opinion, most have strayed very far from the (hopefully) good intentions that spawned them. Longtime readers will recognize this thread, that many of the charities and organizations that choose to attack the beer community from the high moral ground, are themselves often in no position to take such a lofty nose-in-the-air position.
In recent years, several cancer charities have criticized the alcohol industry for our fundraising efforts while hypocritically working with KFC and other unhealthily partners, as I detailed a few years ago with Biting the Hand That Feeds You. Between several of these cancer charities, and the usual prohibitionists, people who work in the alcohol field who want to do good and raise money for a cause that’s dear to them are routinely insulted and criticized for doing so. But taking a closer look at the charities themselves, as I started doing a few years ago, it’s not always clear how much actual good they’re really doing.
Just how many charities are there? In the U.S. alone there are a staggering 1.5 million non-profit organizations, the vast majority of them characterized as public charities. That’s essentially one charity organization for every 213 people in America. Of those, I don’t know how many are involved with cancer, but you can bet it’s a lot. In a partnership between the Tampa Bay Times, the California-based Center for Investigative Reporting, and CNN (who joined the partnership in 2013), they examined all of the charities and created a list of America’s 50 Worst Charities. Of the top ten, the second worst charity in the U.S. is a cancer one, the Cancer Fund of America. In fact, fully four of the top ten are cancer charities. In the full list of the top 48 worst charities, ten of them involve cancer. A surprising number of them are also about missing children, veterans and police and fire fighting groups, sad to say.
But what prompted this was a report on Mashable I saw recently entitled Cancer charities allegedly misused $187 million for concerts and dating sites, U.S. says. Apparently, “Law enforcement from all 50 states and the District of Columbia, along with the Federal Trade Commission” charged four of them — Cancer Fund of America, Cancer Support Services, Children’s Cancer Fund of America and the Breast Cancer Society — “with taking money that donors had given to help cancer patients and using it to on themselves as well as their families and friends,” in an amount in excess of $187 million. The money was used “to buy cars, trips, luxury cruises, college tuition, gym memberships, jet ski outings, sporting event and concert tickets, and dating site memberships,” and even for providing lucrative jobs to friends and family. Two of the charities, Children’s Cancer Fund of America and the Breast Cancer Society, will be shut down. I don’t know why the other two would continue.
The Washington Post also detailed the story, and also published their 5 reasons why it took the feds so long to catch on to the cancer charities scam.
I find it incredibly sad that the state of charities has become so deplorable. It’s to the point where you don’t know whether you can even trust someone soliciting donations, no matter how worthy the cause might sound. The odds are becoming increasingly likely that it may very well be a scam. And undoubtedly that hurts however many charities remain that are actually staying true to their purpose, because at least in my case I’m not giving to anybody until I’ve had a chance to look into the charity asking for my donation. And without the time to adequately do that most times, my default position is a blanket no. So I think the state of the charitable industrial complex has itself become a cancer of sorts, eating itself. With trust in non-profits understandably plummeting, what will that mean for the good work of the few? The sham charities are harming not only the people they bilk out of their cash and savings, but making many others, I have to assume, reluctant to donate to any charity without first knowing more about them. There must be a special circle of hell reserved for these people, praying on people’s better natures with their own worst.
Tuesday’s ad is for Rheingold Beer, from 1953. Today is the birthday of actor John Wayne, who would be 108 if he was still alive. During his lifetime, he did commercials for several beer companies, including this ad for Rheingold Beer.
The image below is a little clearer, but the bottom of the ad has been clipped.
